NeS2 Post 1876
In NeS2 Post 1876, Britt readjusts after travelling a short time into the past with Marquis Rosslefot's Engine in NeS2 Post 1875. He finds himself in the Jupiterian Palace and searches the room until he stumbles upon a salmitton murdering the queen of Jupiter. When fleeing he finds Princess Ptetra, who is now technically queen, and they must escape from the killer - who is named Decline. They leave the palace and travel across the Jupiterian countryside. Ptetra engages sexual contact but she is determined to marry Britt, despite his protests. The Lady Dragon, who Britt had already met, tells them to get a room and so they head for Rosslefot's Cottage. A moment later the past Britt enters the cottage, as does Chronos. Chronos takes Britt out of time and awards him a time-travelling licence, which allows him to travel anywhere in time a total of ten times. Instead of helping his friends, Britt chooses to be selfish and travels back in time. In the present day Story, the NeS Heroes contact MZZT so that he might locate the hidden island base of Darth Vice, who is their current objective. Post Britt: The Legend - Chapter Forty Britt: The Legend - Chapter Forty Britt grumbled something about 'never time-travelling again' as he staggered to his feet. He breathes a deep sigh of frustration. All this adventuring lark was quite beyond what he wanted to be doing with eternity. Riding about from city-to-city, woman-to-woman; that was what he wanted to be doing. Running around saving Princesses was for the birds. He found himself in the palace. He knew where his past self would be and made a mental note to avoid those locations at all costs. He wandered through the rooms, realising he had no bloody idea where the Princess would be at this time. He decided to keep on walking because he had to find her sooner or later, after all he had saved her in the future. Or rather in his future. Confusing. He found the bed chambers and glanced into one. Nothing. The next. Polly's room. He eyed about. The furnishing were guest rooms so he couldn't get much about the woman from that. No laundry strewn on the floor. She's neat. He resisted the urge to go and sneak in and peak at her things. Why Polly's secrets interested Britt, he didn't know. And decided he needed to get away from that woman as soon as possible. Leave Ohqeanos to marry her and move on. Well on. Next room. Nothing. This continued for some time until he finally came to rooms of more grandiosity. He opened a door to see the figure of a man wielding some kind of light sabre! Britt: "Get away from her, you fiend!" Too late! The man stabbed the figure lying in bed. The man turned to see Britt. Man: "Too late. The Queen is dead..." Britt: "Queen? She's not queen yet..." Man: "But there can be no witnesses!" The man pointed the light sabre at Britt. Britt: "Cripes!" He Gebbed it, somehow finding speed where the was no speed. He ran down the corridor and found a door at random. He swung it open and slammed it shut behind him. Woman: "What the devil!?" Britt squealed like a girl as the woman startled him. He turned to see Ptetra sit bolt upright in bed. Britt sighed a sigh of relief like never before. Britt: "I totally thought you were the murderer!" Ptetra: "Murderer!?" Britt: "Quick! We have to hide, Princess!" She hopped out of bed. There was nowhere to hide. Britt looked out of the window. Too high to jump. Ptetra opened the closet, grabbed Britt and shoved him inside. She climbed in after him and they squeezed up in silence and dresses. The door of the room creaked open. The murderer entered his red sabre illuminating the room, but not his face. He neared the bed and pulled back the sheet to confirm nobody was in there. He checked under the bed. He stalked around the room. He checked the window. Britt felt like his stomach was about to drop. He considered how effective his powers of tea would be against a light sabre-wielding maniac. Fortunately he didn't have to find out. Screaming and shouting came from the corridor and the murderer made a run for it. When the coast was clear Britt burst out of the closet. Ptetra: "That was a very tight squeeze, wasn't it?" She seemed to be enjoying herself more than she ought to. Britt tried to breathe. Ptetra: "Relax. Relax. He's gone now." Britt: "I should... say that to you! Look... I'm sorry but I think... I think your mother... She..." Ptetra: "Dead?" Britt nodded. Ptetra: "Finally! The old witch had it coming, I tell you." Britt: "Wait... what?" Ptetra: "But that killer got away. That we can't have. We should go after him!" She ran out of the room. Britt: "Wait! Wait! Don't chase a murderer! That's in the survival guide! Like rule one!" Britt went after her. He chased her silk nightie down the corridor, turned right and then skidded into her back. They both fell over. He looked up to see the killer looming over them. Britt: "Bollocks." Ptetra: "Stop! In the name of the Queen!" Ptetra shouted from beneath Britt. She looked up. Ptetra: "Ah." Murderer: "The Queen is dead, little one..." Ptetra: "Actually that makes me Queen. So. Stop in my name!" The murderer spread his arms wide. Murderer: "I've stopped. What now?" Ptetra: "Uh... surrender?" He grinned a bright, white smile from beneath his dark hood. He finally pulled it back to reveal red skin and stark white hair. Evidently he must be some kind of alien but Britt had no idea what he was. Ptetra: "A Salmitton? On Jupiter?" Britt: "A what?" Ptetra: "They're a race from Mars." Britt: "There are people living on Mars too?" Murderer: "Typical human. Clueless and groping around in the dark." He tapped his unextended light sabre hilt in his hands. Murderer: "And it looks like you've groped more than you can handle right now." Britt jumped to his feet. Britt: "I wasn't groping anything." Ptetra got to her feet. Ptetra: "I wasn't complaining. It's fine." She dusted off Britt's shirt. Britt found himself quite confused. She then pointed at the Salmitton. Ptetra: "It's jail for you, Martian! You can't get away with murdering a Queen. Even if she deserved it." Britt: "You Jupiterians. You're all mental cases." Murderer: "Sounds like we agree on something, human! Maybe I'll spare you for that alone." Britt: "Sounds good to me!" Murderer: "The little Princess dies, however." Ptetra: "I see no princesses here! Only a Queen!" Murderer: "Queen then." His light sabre ignited with a haze of blue. There was the strange sound of echoing voices coming from the bizarre contraption. As he rose it, those eerie voices seemed to grow louder with the swinging action. Ptetra: "My knight in shining armour. Are you going to save me again?" Britt: "Me!?" She shoved him before her. Britt: "Oh Hell!" From his hands burst forth a sudden stream of scorching hot team, just as the sword flickered with movement. The tea burst into the Martian's face and he cried out with sudden pain from the burn. Britt, confidence building, clenched his feet and the tea followed suit. He then punched the guy with a tea-fist as big as a man's chest. The murderer toppled over and rolled down the staircase behind him. When he hit the floor, he was still alive and conscious but dazed. Ptetra: "Wooo! That was incredible! Such wondrous powers!" Britt: "Yeah. Was pretty awesome wasn't it?" Murderer: "Don't think you've won yet. In English my name translates as Decline. And I am the decline of the aristocracy. I will take you all down and no human can stop me." Britt: "Run Princess!" Ptetra: "Queen!" She ran and Britt threw a waterfall of tea on Decline before running himself. The Salmitton was strong, able to withstand even scorching tea without being scarred. He didn't want to stand around and find out if sleepy time tea would work. Better to just run and get away from Decline. They ran down the corridor until they found some stairs and stated down them. They reached the next floor down. Then the next. Then, at the bottom of the stairs Decline skidded to a halt. He must have gone down his own stairs and along the lower corridor to catch up to them. Ptetra turned and ran past Britt, who then followed her. Decline: "You can't escape!" Ptetra: "Guards! Guards! Where the Hell are all the guards!" Decline: "Most of them are dead, Princess! And those that remain..." Some guards finally burst out of a room down the corridor. Decline: "...soon will be." Britt heard the guards cry out behind him as he and the Queen ran. He wasn't sure if he should turn back to help them or keep running. Ultimately his own life was worth more to him than the guards' lives were. Ptetra suddenly stopped and motioned Britt to follow her into an alcove. There they found a small hatch. A secret passage! What palace didn't have one or two tucked away? They crawled through the hatch. As they went all Britt had to look at was Ptetra's behind waggling back and forth. He didn't complain. Eventually she opened another hatch and they were in the gardens. Britt eyed the weird vegetation. A big, yellow, gloopy bush made his stomach churn. Ptetra led him through the gardens and into the city. She let out a cheer when they escaped. Ptetra: "Wooo! What a thrill that was! I'll have to make sure everyone's on alert for that Decline fellow from now on." Britt: "He's still in there somewhere, Princess." Ptetra: "Queen. And I know. You're right. We should elope!" Britt: "Uh... what?" Ptetra: "Runaway! We should run away out of the city! He can't find me out there!" Britt: "Runaway? Right. Yeah! Actually I know exactly where to go. My friend has this... cog-mill... cottage... place. We should be safe there. In fact I know we will. My friends will come looking for us in a couple of days. Actually, I'm surprised we got to us so quickly now that I think about it." Ptetra: "That last part made no sense." Britt: "I'm from the future! I know I saved you because I met you... in the future. But that's my past." Ptetra: "I understand." Britt: "Wait... you do!? I don't think I even understand it and I lived it!" Ptetra: "Time travel. I get it! Not sure if I believe you though. Is that your chat-up line for all the girls?" Britt: "You think it would work?" Ptetra: "Well, it's original at least." And so they headed out of the city. First they followed a path but then veered off of it to better hide themselves from pursuers. They walked across the now familiar fields of red tubers. Mostly they spoke of their lives and what they'd done. Britt had lots of long stories to tell, while Ptetra's tended to be palace-confined gossip. Britt: "And why do you hate your mother so much?" Ptetra: "She was evil. And I mean that literally. Summoned the dead and all that. Worshipped Marduck and fed him sacrifices. Apparently inspired by some ancient Princess that was eaten by Marduck once. He got a taste for it." Horrid memories resurfaced briefly. Britt: "Okay. We should change the topic of conversation. Oh hey, I recognise this cliff!" Ptetra: "I know what we can change it to..." Suddenly she turned and looped her arms around Britt's neck and drew him into a hungry kiss. Her arms moved and her hands caressed his neck, his chest, then she started to tug off his shirt. Britt: "Wow. You're forward, aren't you? My kind of woman." Ptetra: "And you're my kind of man, Britt. You're going to be a great King." Britt stopped and jerked back. Britt: "King? As in, you actually want to get married to me?" Ptetra: "Of course! What I like I keep!" Britt: "I'm not sure that's a good idea. I'm not really much of a... settling down kind of guy." Ptetra smiled. It was sweet but arrogant. She put her hand on his neck but it was slightly firm grip. Tender but aggressive and dominating. Ptetra: "My Britt. I'm Queen of Jupiter now. And the Queen of Jupiter gets what she wants." She shoved him with sudden unexpected strength so he fell onto his back. Next minute she was ontop of him, still in nothing but her nightie! Britt was going through several very, very confused feelings about that moment. Luckily the overriding fear of marriage kept him under control, despite the incredibly passionate moment. Britt: "Wait, wait. Look. I'm all for the sex, but not this whole marriage thing. I really--" Dragon: "Oi! You two! Go get a room, will ya!? Shagging in public! Ought to be a crime!!" The Dragon was sitting in her usual spot and shouted over the fields at them as loudly as if she were right next to them. Ptetra seemed to consider her options but, fortunately, decided against having it off in front of an angry, fat dragon. She got up and a large part of Britt regretted that she did. He breathed in deeply. Slowly. Then got up. Britt: "We should... get to that cottage." After a while of awkward silence, Britt decided to be the first to speak. Britt: "So. What do you think will happen to that Decline geezer? Man he was a nut job, right?" Ptetra: "I'll have him imprisoned." Britt: "Glad you're not into sacrifices too!" Ptetra: "Oh! That's not a bad idea!" Britt stared at her and she laughed. Ptetra: "Just joking! You're actually quite easy to freak out, you know that?" Britt: "Sorry. Let's just say I've experience with Jupiterians before..." He then told her the tale of his previous visit to Jupiter, including the gory details. Ptetra vowed to have the story archived in the palace so that future generations would know about Ptolemy and her actions. Britt, however, felt Ptetra was more excited by the tale of Ptolemy rather than disturbed by the woman's actions. But the story filled the time and they were soon at the cog-mill. This time Britt knocked on the door. It opened instantly. Marquis Rosslefot: "Ah! It's you! I'd been wondering where you and your people had gotten to! I built this house while I was waiting for your presence to be made on my scanners. Peculiar that they didn't pick you up actually..." He tapped a scanning machine but nothing happened. Britt: "Is it plugged in? That's usually the problem..." Marquis Rosselfot: "Of course it's--! Oh." He plugged it in and the scanner came to life. Marquis Rosselfot: "Nobody's perfect, right?" He checked the scanner while Britt and Ptetra sat down. Britt was trying to figure out how he could get Ptetra to see reason. Especially a method that still included sex. However the Marquis interrupted his thoughts pretty quickly. Marquis Rosslefot: "Aha! I have you here, boyo. But it seems your friends are on their way... actually... seems you are on your way too..." Britt: "Yeah, I imagine you're about to find out where." There's a sudden hammering at the window and Britt shot to his feet in panic. Then heard himself shouting. Scene from Chapter Thirty-Nine proceeds. In Rome. Evil G: "How do we find Vice then?" Al Ciao: "The phone book?" Losien: "We could have asked Dr Evil, or one of the other villains, if they were still here. But they're not." Evil G: "Well that was useful input, oh leader of mine." Losien: "Vice is a big time businessman, right? He must have numerous holdings all over the world. But I bet he has one of those islands that's outside of the regulations of the EU and the US. Somewhere he can perform his illicit industry without being thrown in jail." Subaru: "Then MZZT should be able to find it easily. He can find it on the dark web." Evil G: "You make it sound so... seedy." Subaru: "It probably is." Losien lifts up her wrist and pushes in MZZT's number. His face pops up on the holographic screen. Subaru: "I forgot we had those hero watches..." Losien: "We need to find Vice's secret island. I know he has one and that's where he'll be when he'd hiding out." MZZT: "Was there a please in there somewhere?" Losien: "Sorry MZZT. Please." MZZT: "Well... okay then." Evil G: "You big softie. You should have told him who's boss!" MZZT: "I'll put the coordinates through to your watch soon as you close this message window." Losien: "Thanks MZZT." MZZT: "No problem. And tell Evil G he's an ass." Losien: "Evil G... you're an ass." Evil G rolls his eyes and Losien closes the message window. Miss Fire: "Only question now is... how do we get to this island?" Britt: The Legend - continues. Britt saw everyone was frozen in place, except for himself and Chronos. Even past Britt was frozen in place. He waved his hand n front of his past self's face. Nothing. Britt: "This is a neat trick you have, you know?" Chronos: "I know." She sat down and looked tired. Britt joined her. Chronos: "Don't think you can cozy up to me, Britt. You were totally about to sleep with that blonde there. I saw you." Britt: "I wasn't trying to-- why does everyone think the worst of me?" Chronos: "Well alright." Britt: "I mean, I'm not saying I wouldn't. You're a pretty woman but--" Chronos: "That's why people think the worst." Britt stopped talking. Chronos: "You're a problem, Britt. A real problem. But I feel some of that problem is my fault and so special leniency should be awarded to you." Britt: "I thought you didn't want to get cozy?" Chronos: "Not what I meant! I mean... you need a licence." Britt: "A what?" Chronos: "I time-travelling licence. They're not so uncommon as you'd think. But there are rules around it. Like not completely disturbing the timeline, you know? Can I trust you with this kind of thing, Britt?" Britt: "Sure! Who else has got a licence?" Chronos: "Lots of people. It's more rare that they break the rules once they have a licence. That God damn Highemperor broke the rules even though I gave him a licence. The B.A.S.T.A.R.D.S.!" Britt: "That's a bit harsh, don't you think?" Chronos: "It's an acronym. It means--" Britt: "Don't care what it means. It's going to be something dumb." Chronos: "... do you want this freakin' licence or not!?" Britt: "Yes! Yes please!" Chronos: "Good! Then don't back talk! Now I know what my father feels like talking to me..." Britt: "Wow. I can't imagine you having a father..." Chronos: "It's Losien." Britt: "Who?" Chronos: "Uh... you'll find out one day. In your future." Britt: "Ayaaa. More time stuff." Chronos: "That's right! Okay, here." She holds out a shiny, holographic badge that has Britt's awful 'passport photo' picture on it. He didn't even remember taking one. He slipped it into his shirt pocket. Chronos: "So... what year do you want to go to?" Britt: "Any time I like?" Chronos tapped Britt's chest where the card was stashed. Chronos: "You get about ten jumps with this thing. Only ten. Make them count." Britt looked up to see himself and Hulk. He thought of Polly and Ohqeanos. He felt guilty but he wanted to go back. Back in time. Away from this... He tapped his chest. He cast one more look at Ptetra. Would marrying her be all that bad? Maybe not. But it wasn't what he wanted. Not yet. The card activated and he felt lightning streak through his body. He was then gone and time resumed within Rosslefot's cottage. Without him... Category:Post Category:NeS2 Post